Bless Our Cousins

We're approaching the one year anniversary of the death of a family friend. He was young. His passing was sudden and heartbreaking. I often find myself thinking about his family. How are they doing today? What was hard for them today? How have they felt peace? What would they want me or others to know about them and their son?

This loss happened during a time that was very challenging for our own family for different reasons. When things are hard for me, I'm more likely to become quiet, withdrawn, introspective. I don't know if our kids sensed the stress, but I did notice a change in our family prayers--especially Gavin's.

What could a five-year old understand about such a loss? I tried not to be too surprised by his intuitiveness. Brooklyn too, who had just been baptized and made that beautiful promise in the Book of Mormon, Mosiah . They seemed to instinctively understand what it was to mourn with those that mourn.

Every time Gavin was called upon to pray, morning, night, or at meals, he included this family in his prayers. Every time.

After a few months, he didn't stop. And the lessons and experience we gained in learning to mourn with those that mourn didn't stop either.

Gavin's uncle's dad died. Their family was added to his prayers. Another family close to us were faced with a sudden move across the country--much like our move. They were added to Gavin's prayers. My best friend lost her father suddenly. He added her family to his prayers.

With the addition of my friend's family, Gavin's prayers changed. He didn't stop praying for our dear friends and family who experienced trials, but his list was getting long. He resorted to saying, "Bless our cousins. Help them with what they need."

Technically, not all these people are our cousins. But he thinks of close family friends this way.

So Gavin prays for our cousins. And I have found myself using the same words in my prayers. Sometimes I name them individually. Sometimes I simply see their faces in my mind as I say, "Bless our cousins." We plead with God to comfort them, and to give them the power they need to overcome their sadness and stress. To give them peace.

I know He listens.

Comments

That Sinking Feeling - Real Talk From Your Mother

Also found at Letters from the Nest: https://open.substack.com/pub/lettersfromthenest/p/that-sinking-feeling?r=48qui&utm_campaign=post&utm_medium=web Dear Nestlings, I hope you don’t mind a little stream-of-consciousness letter today. I don’t know if I have anything specific to share, so let’s see what floats to the surface. It’s a bright fall Friday morning. These last few weeks in central Pennsylvania have been lovely, sunny, and warm. I know winter is coming, so I try to be outside as much as possible to take advantage of the sun before it hibernates. I just completed the forty-minute round trip to drive one of you to the high school. You know who you are, but maybe in a few years, when you read this, you won’t know because every one of you has missed the bus sometimes and has endured lectures about planning better and showing your respect for my work by not requiring forty minutes of my life for your convenience. Anyway, everybody is at school and work except...

Gavin in a Million Words or Less

Way back when Emily was in 6th grade, her teacher, Ms. Grey, asked parents to write about thier children in a million words or less. I posted what I wrote about Emily on our blog. I wish I were more organized and tech-savvy to find the link to that post and put it here, but I'm not. It's a nice idea that maybe I'll do later. Anyway, you get to read what I wrote to Gavin's fifth grade teacher who made the same requests of parents: Gavin is the youngest of seven children. His three oldest siblings have flown the nest, so he talks to them on the phone and looks forward to holiday visits. This summer, his oldest sister had a baby, so he’s an Uncle! He has three older brothers, who sometimes make life tricky for him, but are also sources of wisdom, rides to the store to get candy, and annoying TikTok phrases. He sometimes wants to be more grown up than he actually is. This little guy is academically oriented. He loves to read BIG books. He rarely reads a standalone nove...

Back To School Meanies

Letter From the Nest August 15, 2025 https://open.substack.com/pub/lettersfromthenest/p/back-to-school?r=48qui&utm_campaign=post&utm_medium=web One August, more than twenty years ago, at an evening book club discussion, my “older” friends (now I look back and know those women were the age I am now), were discussing the woes and triumphs of back-to-school season. One woman was anticipating her youngest child’s senior year of high school. She said, “For more than two decades, our lives have revolved around the school district’s academic calendar. I don’t know how I will plan my life without knowing about school breaks or holidays.” I remember her bittersweet tone as she anticipated freedom from school schedule constraints but also mourned how those constraints guided her choices. What would she do? Other women joined the discussion, wondering if their kids would have good teachers, if they’d be able to balance volunteering in the classroom, how to streamline school supply pu...

The Mergenthaler Family

Search This Blog