Letters from the Nest
https://lettersfromthenest.substack.com/p/a-lot-doesnt-have-to-be-too-much
We’re barely hanging on here as we fly through May and into June. Like many families with school-aged children, May is a very busy month for us. There are performances, concerts, field trips, and graduations. There is garden prep and planting. There’s Mother’s Day, and four birthdays. There’s Memorial Day weekend and our wedding anniversary. Dad often has a work conference or two, which he juggles with taking you across the country to participate in sports camps at BYU. In May, we remove the cover from the pool and work diligently to clean and treat it in preparation for summer fun. Daily rain turns our yard into a grassy jungle. Healthy grass means we also have healthy weeds infiltrating our garden boxes. We have a few dead trees on our property that need to be taken down, but we already have a gigantic pile of firewood from last year’s storm damage. All of it combined is A LOT.
I have been thinking about how often I hear that something is “a lot.”
How many kids do you have? Seven.
That’s a lot.
How long does it take you to mow your yard? 5 hours.
That’s a lot.
Can you help me carry in the groceries?
That’s a lot.
What are my chores today? I made you a list.
That’s a lot.
We have state testing at school this week every single day.
That’s a lot.
I will be gone most of the day at meetings.
That’s a lot.
Meals made, laundry washed, weeds picked, floors cleaned, friends visited, assignments completed, meetings attended, spaces organized, library books checked out and returned, emails written, bills paid, trips scheduled, trash disposed, dishes done, stories told, disappointments processed, feelings felt. It’s a lot!
Are you getting tired of things being “a lot?” As I was falling asleep last night after a very busy week and anticipating another busy week, I thought, “It sure is a lot.” And I began to feel like “a lot” was “too much.” I wanted to drop it all and disappear, but I knew that if I did, all of the things I wanted to run away from would still be here when I got back. The only way out is through, as they say.
Is there a way through the busy month that is more fulfilling and joyful than accomplishing tasks? Absolutely. A perspective change came to my mind last night when I thought, “It sure is a lot.”
When you hear somebody say, “That’s a lot,” are you hearing, “That’s too much?” When you think, “That’s a lot,” are you thinking, “It’s more than I can handle?” What if “a lot” meant something different? What if “a lot” connotated a joyful abundance rather than an impossible burden?
When “a lot” implies joyful abundance, the tone shifts significantly. Each event is an opportunity for celebration. Each interaction can be a meaningful connection. The work we do is not simply feeding more work, but allowing for increased growth and capacity. Full schedules can be full lives.
I’m not saying there’s no room for paring down--especially when we truly are feeling overburdened, but maybe some of that burdensome feeling is more about our thoughts and attitudes about the work than the work itself.
We’re more than halfway through May, and we have had visitors, gone to new places, tried new recipes, shared interesting ideas, served each other, played games, eaten delicious food, celebrated accomplishments, encouraged each other, laughed at awkward situations, and learned some hard lessons. I am grateful for the abundance.
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